Canis lupus hominis

Posted in dog breeding | Tagged breeding bulldogs, bulldog, toaddog | 21 Comments

21 Responses

1. on August 15, 2012 at 11:22 pm Nara

   I’m disgusted by this. I often forget just how gross, dysfunctional messes English Bulldogs are as I never watch anything about the modern ones and rarely meet one in real life. These dogs shouldn’t exist.

   
   
   • on August 15, 2012 at 11:24 pm retrieverman

     I am not against AI.

     But if something cannot mate on its own, your probably shouldn’t force the issue.

     
     
     • on August 16, 2012 at 9:05 am UrbanCollieChick

       SERIOUSLY! Um, isn’t this a sign that something is seriously WRONG here? And not that she’s human, but I wonder how much that female bulldog appreciated being held in place for the event? I actually find that harder to watch than watching a dog or lion attack and kill prey animals.

       I much prefer to see two dogs left to their own devices in somebody’s backyard or private area, and go about the mating dance normally.

       Isn’t ANYTHING natural and healthy anymore?

       
       
       • on August 16, 2012 at 11:21 am megrim43

         My Papillon males (and the Chin) were highly entertained by this video of “natural mating”.
         They have a different version:

         1. Find out where the bitch is being kept
         2. Pretend to be indifferent
         3. Wait until owner is distracted by phone or doorbell or dog altercation outside.
         4, Force door, or climb in window
         5. Do the deed as quickly as possible
         6. When she comes back and shouts and screams at you, remember, it was well worth it
         7. Plan to do it again

         Actually this is their dream, and I usually manage to foil their plans.
         But Papillons, and my Chin dog, are randy little beasts who would usually scorn any type of “help”.

         Elizabeth

         
         
         • on August 16, 2012 at 1:17 pm UrbanCollieChick

           Megrim43 that is so cute, and so normal! I had to laugh, not least of which because I am currently reading Marilyn Manson’s autobiography and am still in the early portion, where he’s a high school teen trying desperately to have a sex life.

           I guess it’s the theme of the day!

           
           
     • on August 16, 2012 at 10:06 am Nara

       To me it seems that English Bulldogs appeal to those mad scientist type people, people who want to see how much they can manipulate nature and get away with it.

       
       
   • on August 16, 2012 at 3:04 am Sarah Coberly

     The only reason they exist is because of humans. If we didn’t inhabit this world, they wouldn’t either, because we are the only way they can even breed. I find that pretty messed up too.

     
     
2. on August 16, 2012 at 3:03 am Sarah Coberly

   God. The dogs are one thing, the breeder is a whole ‘nother story. Can you keep your hand off the balls/penis for like, 10 seconds? We had to breed a Shih Tzu to a Cocker on a ramp but it was much more professional than this, and they did indeed do it all on their own, and even having to do that irritated me but this? Whole new level of irritation…

   
   
3. on August 16, 2012 at 7:56 am Barry

   He states the bulldog is the most beautiful and noble breed and then immediately adds that they (the breed) could NEVER be capable of doing this on their own..huh? Just listen to the sound of those two hackers with every cacking breath..all in the vain of nobility..ha, you paint a turd..it’s still a turd. The seeing and hearing can truly be blind and deaf.

   
   
4. on August 16, 2012 at 9:07 am UrbanCollieChick

   Now I’m curious about finding a video exemplifying the breeding of Pekingese; the OTHER abomination of the dog world.

   
   
5. on August 16, 2012 at 9:39 am massugu

   I find it hard to believe that anyone–no matter how dedicated to the breed as it now its exists–could countenance a breed of dog that cannot reproduce naturally, that sinks instead floats, that has to be delivered by C-section. This is no longer a breed of dog its an artifice, a synthetic being, unnatural! (Not to mention unconscionable.)

   
   
6. on August 16, 2012 at 10:04 am justanotherbyb

   I worked as a veterinary assistant for a few years. Not many clients owned bulldogs, but I remember dreading it whenever one did walk through the door. Dumb as boxes of rocks, and neurotic when it came to drawing blood or clipping nails or basically doing anything. You couldn’t muzzle them because of their flat faces. It was difficult to restrain them because of their strength and the fact that they sounded like they were going to die of respiratory distress.

   And the skin problems. *barf* I have a pretty strong stomach–I can eat popcorn while watching a dog’s uterus be removed–but after having to scoop the cheesy build-up from between the fatty folds of skin around a bulldog’s tail, I thought I was going to puke.

   I remember telling the veterinarian that I couldn’t stand this breed of dog.

   
   
7. on August 16, 2012 at 10:46 am justanotherbyb

   My iPhone is being lame, Retrieverman. Can you erase my first comment (as it didn’t appear to have posted when I first tried because of my lame iPhone)?

   
   
8. on August 16, 2012 at 12:30 pm Barry

   From a bulldog website with my own added comments:

   5 Things “NOT” To Do with a Bulldog

   1. Never ever allow a Bulldog to swim or be near a pool or water source when unattended. Even when with someone, keep a very close eye on him and keep him in your site always while around water. While CPR is a good option to use in drowning’s, it still has low odds of survival in Bulldogs….and best to avoid getting into that sitaution in the first place!

   …CPR should be used as often as possible regardless of water hazards just to say you love your bulldog

   Bulldogs don’t swim and will die fast, in a matter of seconds. It’s always a safe choice to use a life vest on your bulldog while your with him swimming or near a water source. His weight may prevent you from holding him up or rescue of him. A swimming life vest prevents that. If you have a pool, be sure it has a dog safe fence with self latching gates, just like you would have for a child.

   ..and add a respirator because you love your bulldog

   2. Avoid heat. Bulldog will quickly die from exposure to hot tempatures, anything over 82 degrees is considered hot and caution should be used. That’s with a healthy bulldog, if your dog has troubles breathing or health issues, that tempature is to high. Bathroom breaks and exercise is fine at up to 82 degrees for a healthy dog, just keep cool water available, know the signs of over heating and how to treat it and don’t allow them to run and play hard when tempatures are hot, keep outside time limited to short periods of less than 30 minutes with shade.

   …ooohhh, must suck to be a bulldog owner..perhaps only keep bulldogs north and south of the 55th parallels respectively

   3. Avoid allowing your bulldog to GULP his food down, he should eat steadily and not to fast, in addition raw hide products should be avoided and small balls or any objects that can be a choking hazard should be avoided.

   ..keep kibble no larger than pea size and hand feed whenever possible

   4. Never allow your dog to run off leash when near traffic, streets or other animals and when out in the open in any area near a street.

   (NOTE:) Beware that bulldogs get stolen and caution should always be used as people will steal them from your own backyard, at a park, from your car and other ways.

   …it’s also known that folks will pickup your discarded items if you place them out at the curb

   5. Avoid a vet that does not have experience with bulldogs. They are a special breed with special needs and can’t be treated like any other dog.

   …kaching, kaching $$$$

   ..but hey, keep the breed up to the regal standard that it is because you love them.

   
   
9. on August 16, 2012 at 1:21 pm UrbanCollieChick

   Can’t tolerate anything above 82 eh? Yeah, if I had one it WOULD die because the Con Ed people here who provide the power for NYC charge a king’s ransom!

   $$ Kaching indeed!

   
   
10. on August 16, 2012 at 6:38 pm cyborgsuzy

    Oh, so not a rape-rack technically… they just physically hold the female down. “Natural” is sooo much better. :P

    
    
11. on August 16, 2012 at 9:57 pm Luka's Mom

    Sooooo. This video made me want to vomit. The “breeder” seemed a little too involved. I was even more creeped out knowing that he was teaching his daughters the “family business”. And may I be permitted to ask just how many puppies they get annually and how many bitches that requires since said bitches may only have one litter ever in their lifetime? “My dogs are trained to do this, so.” and “We may not have the best, but we love what we do.” WTF is wrong with this guy?

    
    
    • on August 16, 2012 at 10:05 pm retrieverman

      I guess he loves helping disgusting animals have sex.

      What a business to be in!

      
      
12. on August 16, 2012 at 10:42 pm Rathunters

    Natural must mean something werry different in English than I thought it did, for that did not look anything like a natural mating to me. This was disgusting, I can maybe agree that we should not ban a breed, but my God what is the value value of preserving these toaddogs!??

    
    
    • on August 17, 2012 at 12:05 am Pai

      They claim it’s to ‘preserve a precious historic breed’, until you point out that the modern dogs look and behave nothing like the original type, wherein they will then claim it’s because they’ve ‘improved’ the breed and the original dogs were all crap.

      Cognitive dissonance at it’s best.

      
      
13. on August 17, 2012 at 5:37 am Raziar

    Natural my arse.
    I’m a pretty poor nationalist however, I don’t think the modern English bulldog is worthy of being a symbol of anything British that we could be proud of.

    I suggest we replace it with a more functional dog like a lurcher(I know it’s not a breed)or a patter dale terrier, or even the border collie.

    
    

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