Canis lupus hominis

Posted in wildlife | Tagged buck, white-tailed buck, white-tailed deer | 5 Comments

5 Responses

1. on November 3, 2013 at 10:05 am massugu

   Wouldn’t fit a basketball in that rack I’ll bet.

   
   
   • on November 3, 2013 at 10:18 am retrieverman

     I’ve only seen photos of this buck at night, and he has bizarre antlers that almost point. He looks like some kind of demon at night.

     
     
2. on November 3, 2013 at 11:50 am d.penizek@aon.at

   That’s not a buck, it’s a stag—at least that’s what we call them here in Austria!

   Dorothea Penizek

   http://www.claremorris-parson-russells.at

   
   
   • on November 3, 2013 at 11:57 am retrieverman

     It’s the size of a fallow buck, smaller than a red deer stag (Rothirsch).

     
     
3. on November 3, 2013 at 12:36 pm cher

   He is a show buck deer. We need to make him a much used stud with his own daughters, then with his granddaughters by his daughters, then again and again “in and in” breed his line (to perfect it of course), each time selecting the females which best fit our standard

   (which we will clone from the German Sheperd Dog standard because deer SHOULD look and move like kangeroos [I mean dogs], except for the antlers [GSD don’t have antlers – yet], which should be as inward growing as possible [because nature didn’t get it right, but we will], and will be the hallmark of our breed: The American Tennis Ball Deer.

   We will toot our own horns and tell all the wildlife officials how they need to import our Tennis Ball Deer into their woods because Tennis Ball Deer are real deer, but regular deer are just vulger common deer. Then we will tell the hunters’ wives how Tennis Ball Deer are better on the table and better for their families (OH WHO CARES IF IT IS TRUE, beside if we say it often enough nobody will ask HOW they are better than mutt deer).

   And we need to make hunters hate mutt deer (see how I use the new insulting name for regular deer?) because mutt deer eat forage that could be going to Tennis Ball Deer. Then we need to get California to outlaw mutt deer because mutt deer just aren’t fashionable or nice. Tennis Ball Deer are much nicer. And only nice people have nice deer in their woods. Mutt deer give your state a bad name.

   After we get rid of mutt deer, we need to change Tennis Ball Deer so that the fawns are born by C-section because …oh I’l think of some reason later… and veterinarians will make more money that way (getting them on our side) and keeping the price of Tennis Ball Deer fawns up.

   Then we will have a company selling pieces of paper with numbers and words on them (Hey, don’t let ANYONE expect leadership, science, or common sense from us!).

   
   

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